"Just so you're all aware," Robert, the tour guide, shouted as our group shuffled around Salzberg (which was unsurprisingly lacking in nuns and singing children) "I am well versed in all 'Sound of Music' hits and if requested, can lead the group in a singsong"
Groans rippled through the crowd as Robert snapped his Leiderhosen and told anyone who'd listen that he'd directed a version of the play in Amateur Dramatics.
Unfortunately, Robert's personal achievements were the only things impressive about the city. Shops were packed with tourists buying anything with Julie Andrew's face on for the bargain price of 40 euros. Sticking a celebrity's face on something is like encrusting it with diamonds - it becomes ten times more expensive. Streets were filled with small children, that could speak more German than our tour guide, who were feeded Salzbiscuits to seagulls.
If it wasn't the sound of 'Doe, Rae, Me' being hummed by everyone, some more enthusiastic than others, we might have been able to enjoy the chiming of the Glockenspiel, that seemed to ring every other second.
Sitting on church steps, waiting for the coach to come and rescue us all wasn't exactly a highlight of the holiday. I can't say that playing Miniature Golf, the same course you can find in Bristol, was traditionally Bavarian, but that's what I distinctly remember about the trip.
Bavaria held other exciting new experiences, like watching a man dive off the edge of a mountain that was 6,473ft from the ground. Skydive, that is, for those wondering if he ended up flatter than an Austrian pancake. It was quite a performance watching the man set up his parachute and tieing himself into a backpack the size of a German grizzly bear.
The Rauschberg mountain is situated in the small town of Ruhpolding. It's a popular spot for skydiving and, for those less adventurous out there, hiking routes. With neon yellow signs directing you to the bottom there's a guarantee you won't get lost…probably.
Once you've made the exhausting trip up the mountain, or the more popular option of the ski-lift, there's a delightful wooden cabin at the top, serving apple streusel and blackberry cheesecake made with goat's milk. Sure it's four euros a slice - sans Julie Andrews' face - but well worth a taste all the same.
If you want to get even more involved in the Bavarian culture, attend what's known as a 'Hut Evening' at a local pub or restaurant. My family made the decision, although it was probably a mistake in retrospect, of attending a Hut Evening that commenced at 6pm and ending at 10:30pm. According to experts four and a half hours is the longest amount of time anyone can listen to old men with walrus moustaches yodelling at the top of their lungs. That is one evening I'm not likely to forget any time soon - probably because it's permanently scarred my ear drums…
Overall, Bavaria is beautiful, brimming with tradition and opportunities to act like locals, waving white and blue checkered flags and donning lion hats with pride. The perfect holiday for those not afraid of looking a little stupid.
Another great text full of verbal wit and originality, Maddie. It is very ENTERTAINING indeed. I think that your fiction piece remains the best so far but this has the potential to be better than that even. If you decided to use this alongside the fiction piece, you would need to make this convincing as a text to INFORM, since the fictional chapter already fits the ENTERTAINMENT purpose / category.
ReplyDeleteThis would mean that this text would need to be expanded with more factual information that would be useful to a reader who is considering visiting Bavaria. For example, it isn't clear what "glockenspiel" you were referring to. Is it a popular site / feature in Salzburg? The name of the nearby mountain etc?
Another possible weakness would be the conclusion. I can see that you were being ironic in the sentence about "the opportunity to act like locals" but you are likely to confuse readers by starting the sentence with "beautiful" since that seems to contradict the previous descriptions and the rest of the last paragraph. Perhaps it could be improved by having some serious descriptions earlier of the "beauty" of the place to balance out the humour.